I met a
long-lost friend recently. When I asked her about her life, she had the streak
of pride and contentment in her voice as she informed me about her profession as
an educationist.
“… And I am
planning on expanding my business overseas.” She had those dreamy eyes as she
continued darting all her quests one by one. “What are you doing these days?”
She suddenly checked herself and shifted her expectant gaze at me.
I had no
stories to share. I took a deep breath and hid my embarrassment;
“I do
nothing, I’m a housewife.” As soon as those words slipped out from my mouth, I felt
my life hollow with the lack of any noteworthy accomplishment. She had all the
information required on politics, finance, worldly affairs and how business
should be done; while I sat dumbfounded taking large sips of the hot coffee and
looking around some sign to slip away from yet another thwarting situation.
All the way
back home, I wondered if I had wasted my entire youth cleaning dishes and
mopping the house. I was an intelligent student in school and my teachers had
great expectations from me. But when I got married, I didn’t realize that the
greater part of my time, health and energy would be sucked away by the marital
commitment. Although I can proudly say that I am scoring well as an efficient
house wife and mother, but is it really fulfilling to be in such a thankless
and payless job?
I am aware
that every housewife these days think the same. We are simply dragging our
lives, counting days and waiting for weekends like every boring office job. But
the difference here lies in the fact that weekends are no off for us. We work
overtime instead, entertaining kids and husband as they lie on bed, ordering us
around. And the worst part lies in the fact that we are not paid any bonus for
working overtime.
“So, when
will our life start?” I turned to my mom for help like I do habitually. She had
a very confident look on her face when she replied me; “Once your kids grow up
and get married, then you are free to do any job.”
I eyed her
in speculation. If that was the solution, then I dared to ask her why was she
lying on her bed and complaining all the time about her loneliness and joint problems.
She got me married long time back. She would have sorted her life and must have
been a part of a success story.
“I had no other
talent, dear. I only knew how to be a home maker.” She didn’t hesitate to reply
my unspoken question. The truth is that we get so badly molded by the routine
that we eventually forget what else we are capable of.
I met my
friends next day and my question was still the same. They eyed me suspiciously,
as if I was pioneering a revolution. “What’s wrong with this? We don’t have to
go to any office. We can spend all the money our husband earns. It’s a life of
a queen.” One of them cheered all the others who were disgusted by my out of
the box inquiry.
“Yeah, queen
holding a mop.” I muttered in disappointment. She had actually responded just
like my husband. Maybe we all are different and a few ladies, who find living
aimlessly very satisfying, blow away the chances for those who itch to seek
thrill in their lives.
I understand
that it’s safer to live this way but is it that fulfilling? Why do we shy away then
when we meet a successful woman? Why other women bitch about her that she is a terrible
mom and an awful wife? Why do we envy her fishing out the credit card by her
name and paying the bills on her own? Is it because deep inside every woman
there is someone who wants to explore the world and earn every penny that she
spends?
Every woman
yearns to be respected and looked up. But the sad part is that we lose the
respect as soon as we decide to sacrifice our dreams to sit home and take care
of our families. But if we refuse to do it, then who would take care of those
little things that makes the living of our kids and spouse easier. If we don’t do
their laundry, then would they go to school or office in dirty or crinkled
clothes? If there is no cooked food, then they would eat all the takeouts and
ruin their health. Lastly, soiled and messed up homes only lead to diseases and
misplaced things. Then there is definitely no use chasing dreams if our
families are suffering.
Yes, we
house lizards sacrifice a lot. We sit idly waiting for kids and husband to get
home from school and office, and feed them healthy and clean food, give them
freshly laundered clothes to wear after every bath and make sure their rooms
are clean. All the time, we don’t miss the chance to dream how our life would
be if we were not fixed on our house floor, mopping it clean.
Well, let me
assure all my sisters that successful people don’t blink and touch their
destiny overnight. They too work really hard to reach to some level. They too
ruin their health and those tiny dreams of watching their kids dance on their
annual function. They nurture their work just like we do to our homes. Thus, we
are no different. We are successful but the credit does not fall in our laps
immediately. We are paid back when our family laughs and dance around the spotless
house, when we save pennies throughout the year to present ourselves with a
designer purse, and when our spouse turns and smiles in satisfaction. At that
very moment, we know we are on the right track.
